Thoughts vs. Feelings

"I feel rejected." 
"It feels like you're disrespecting me."
"You abandoned me."

Everyone confuses their thoughts and feelings at some point - especially when our brains are hijacked by strong, painful emotions. These strong emotions can trigger a threat response in the brain that has the power to turn our lovers into adversaries and friends into foes.

Emotions are pretty basic. A psychologist in the 70's, Paul Eckman, identified 6 basic emotions: Happiness, Anger, Disgust, Fear, Sadness and Surprise. This was a cross cultural exploration of the basic emotions all humans share. We have a much wider range to describe different hues of the primary 6 but you won't find words like abandoned, rejected, disrespected or ghosted. These are actions. Better yet, they're a perception of an action. 

I'll rewrite the above statements in feelings words:

"I feel sad."
"I'm angry."
"I'm hurt."

Take accountability for how you're feeling. They're healthy cues letting you know how to engage with the world.  That's where you have the power to assert yourself and create change.

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